Things I Had

Dear life,
Hi, its me again.
I know in my numerous previous poems,
I had talked about how you were never going to see me fall,
I talked about how i was always gonna stand tall,
Even when you try to make me fall.
I’ve always been a victim of your bad side,
For all I’ve ever known
Is nothing but pains.
You’ve seen me fall many a times,
But you never saw me cry,
That’s how strong I’ve been.
For i fought with every single drop of blood in me.
Guess i really did fought with every drop of blood in me,
Cause the heart beat in my chest feels weak tonight.
Guess this is the final goodbye,
Dear life guess you finally won,
This is my end.
I don’t see any reason for me not to take my life anymore.
This is the end of my road.

But before i leave you,
O cruel world,
I will make a list of the things i had.
Know if I’ll be missed or forgotten,
And prolly know if being alive is still worth it.
So this is a list of the things i had ;
I had a caring family,
That loved me to the moon and back,
A family that gave its all just to see the best of me.
A family that sacrificed it’s all,
Just to see a smile on my face.
Do i pay this family back with suicide?
Or what about the friends i had,
That supported me physically, emotionally and mentally,
The real gees,
The friends that were there,
When family could not.
How selfish of me will it be,
To cause them pains by ending my life,
To gain eternal peace?
Will there ever be an eternal peace for me,
Hurting and breaking their hearts
By committing suicide.
Some had legs but could not walk,
Some had eyes but could not see,
Some had ears but could not hear.
I had all these and they worked perfectly fine.

I had thought i had no reasons not to take my life,
But the little things i had,
Which i overlooked,
We’re the reasons i could ever need,
Not to end my life.
So dear life,
It’s me again.
You might have won again,
But this is not the end of me,
For the things i had are far more greater than those
I didn’t.
And for the things i had,
I’ll keep on fighting.